The Trouble with Miami

For the last 53 days, I have been exploring Miami...'s malls. At the start let me make clear this: I strongly dislike Malls. They aren't much different then the straw markets I strongly dislike in any Caribbean Port of Call. Well that isn't entirely true. One has a Straw Roof and one doesn't. One might ask why, in all this time, I haven't  explored the Everglades and all of it's inhabitants? The truth is, I have done so already in the past, and had a close encounter with a crocodile / alligator / snake, I am not to sure which one it was as it all happened so fast:

Picture it: Sicily - 1863... I was coming in on the train eating an Italian spicy sausage and it was giving me heartburn real bad, I had just gotten married to the Mayor's daughter and we were on our way to the reception in the town square where the clock tower stood...

Uhh... Sorry, I was recounting the nightmare I had last night.

Picture it: Miami - Early 2010. The Saints had just Won the SuperPlate, there was a president in the Whitehouse, Taylor Swift broke up with her 32nd boyfriend, and I was flying into Miami to join a ship. I had a few days and thought I should check out the sites and sounds of Miami, but for some reason Walmart just wasn't cutting it, so I decided to go check out the Everglades. There I was, on my own I might add, walking through ''the 'glades'' as we like to call 'em down here, looking at the nature, breathing in the free range air. Looking at the grassgreen grass and thoroughly enjoying my day out in the 'glades. Then it happened... out of the corner of my eye I see a swatch of green. Green like an alligator purse...sort of...I guess, well anyway I turned my head and saw eyes in the water. Was it a croc' or a gator, as we like to call 'em down here?  Could it be the reflection of a snake's eyes in the tree above? Who knew? it was anybody's guess. Well, as you could imagine I stopped stone cold. Fearful that any move might set whatever it was, off. I was sweating... I kept asking myself over and over again why I came here all by myself. All of a sudden I see a flash of green lurch out and I let out this audio scream and let me tell you, it was a good thing he was behind the glass, because it wouldn't have been a pretty day at the zoo. 

So you see, I have done my fair share of Miami exploring. Besides it's hard to explore when the only thing I can say to anyone in Spanish is Hotdog, which is Pero Cliente con queso por favor. I have been very lucky to have so many friends from cruise ships working in the office including good friends, Butch, Noonan, and Melody. Plus a level one friend flew in to visit, so my dance card has been too full to take full advantage of Miami. I did sit court side at a Miami Heat Game with the club owner. That was fantastic! I have to tell you though Monday through Friday I am in the corporate world. Working hard from 10 - 2, creating schedules for the my next contract in Norway, attending meetings and focus groups about...well it must have been something with regard to... travelling. By the time I drive to the hotel next door I am so exhausted it feels as if I am stoned most evenings... but I am not. So the thought of having to put on a pair of wellingtons just to look for swamp creatures, that probably only know how growl in Spanish, is not my idea of a good time. You know what they do have here? The Cinebistro! It is this movie theatre that you can go to and have dinner served to you... while you watch the movie! Hello! Now that is time well spent.